Save the mystery

Life should retain a sense of mystery. Damn marketing people. From the Daily Telegraph:

Life should have an element of risk about it: eyeing up a succulent piece of tenderloin in the butcher's and thinking: "Shall I, shan't I or will it just be consigned to the rubbish bin before I have time to sear it?" "Oh go on, be a devil," a little voice always says, against my better judgement.

Just to make me appear an even sadder case, I was further distressed to read on my flight to Milan this afternoon that the makers of Marmite are planning to put it into squeezy tubes, abandoning the traditional thick brown glass jars it has been stored in for as long as I can remember.

The manufacturers say in their defence that the tubes are all about "versatility" and getting rid of the 'crumbs-in-the-jar' scenario which has apparently been upsetting consumers for years.

But anyone who is familiar with Marmite - a very salty yeast extract of a thick consistency, which British children typically eat on thin strips of bread known as 'soldiers' - will know that it can't possibly be squeezed out of a tube. Not unless the makers change its consistency.
And sure enough, that is the plan. It's to be thinned down! It's worse than when they swapped the name "Marathon" for "Snickers".

What will be next?